Did I Marry The Right Person?

I found this article from an email, it's interesting but it doesn't tell what are the laws for relationships. Do you know?

Read on ...

During one of our seminars, a woman asked a common question.
She said, "How do I know if I married the right person?"
I noticed that there was a large man sitting next to her so I said,
"It depends. Is that your husband?" In all seriousness, she answered "How do you know?"

Let me answer this question because the chances are
good that it's weighing on your mind.

Here's the answer.
EVERY relationship has a cycle. In the beginning, you fell in love with your spouse. You anticipated their call, wanted their touch, and liked their idiosyncrasies.

Falling in love with your spouse wasn't hard. In fact, it was a completely natural and spontaneous experience. You didn't have to DO anything. That's why it's called "falling" in love...

Because it's happening TO YOU.

People in love sometimes say, "I was swept of my feet." Think about the imagery of that expression. It implies that you were just standing there; doing nothing, and then something came along and happened TO YOU.

Falling in love is easy. It's a passive and spontaneous experience.
But after a few years of marriage, the euphoria of love fades. It's the natural cycle of EVERY relationship. Slowly but surely, phone calls become a bother (if they come at all), touch is not always welcome (when it happens), and your spouse's idiosyncrasies, instead of being cute, drive you nuts.

The symptoms of this stage vary with every relationship, but if you think about your marriage, you will notice a dramatic difference between the initial stage when you were in love and a much duller or even angry subsequent stage.

At this point, you and /or your spouse might start asking, "Did I marry the right person?" And as you and your spouse reflect on the euphoria of the love you once had, you may begin to desire that experience with someone else. This is when marriages breakdown. People blame their spouse for their unhappiness and look outside their marriage for fulfillment.

Extramarital fulfillment comes in all shapes and sizes. Infidelity is the most obvious.
But sometimes people turn to work,a hobby, a friendship, excessive TV, or abusive substances.

But the answer to this dilemma does NOT lie outside your marriage.
It lies within it. I'm not saying that you couldn't fall in love with someone else. You could.

And TEMPORARILY you'd feel better. But you'd be in the same situation a few years later.
Because (listen carefully to this):

THE KEY TO SUCCEEDING IN MARRIAGE IS NOT FINDING THE RIGHT PERSON;
IT'S LEARNING TO LOVE THE PERSON YOU FOUND.

SUSTAINING love is not a passive or spontaneous experience. It'll NEVER just happen to you.
You can't "find" LASTING love. You have to "make" it day in and day out.
That's why we have the expression "the labor of love."

Because it takes time, effort, and energy . And most importantly, it takes WISDOM .
You have to know WHAT TO DO to make your marriage work.

Make no mistake about it. Love is NOT a mystery. There are specific things you can do
(with or without your spouse) to succeed with your marriage.

Just as there are physical laws of the universe (such as gravity), there are also laws for relationships. Just as the right diet and exercise program makes you physically stronger, certain habits in your relationship WILL make your marriage stronger. It's a direct cause and effect.

If you know and apply the laws, the results are predictable...you can "make" love.

人生像在寻找答案

人生像在寻找答案.
有时寻着的以为是答案却叫人堕落.
有时以为不是的答案却才是为一的答案.
何时才能寻着那完全的答案?

Words of Wisdom

You must stand in other person's shoe and look at the situation through their eyes in order to truly understand their perspective.

Faith determine who comes into your life.
The Heard detemine who stays.

What you do today is getting you closer to where you want to be tomorrow.

Don't let the odds keep you from pursuing what you know you were meant to be.

Seek respect rather than popularity.

Be willing to accept a temporary inconvenience for a permanent improvement.

Happiness doesn't depend on how much you have to enjoy, but how much you enjoy what you have.

A happy person is not a person in a certain set of circumstances but rather a person with certain set of attitudes.

You live longer once you realize that anytime spent being unhappy is wasted.

You can't experience being alive without realizing that you have to die.
It is just as impossible to realize you have to die without thinking how incredibly amazing it is to be alive.

Whaaaaaat ??!!

I couldn't believe what I have read from an email! Yin Qi is recruiting for orchestra members!

Wow, for all my life I thought I can only dream to play in a Christian ministry orchestra but now, my dream may come true. Why may? Cause I have not reach their minimum requirement yet, which is grade 6.

When I'm still wondering whether it is possible to join the orchestra one day, a friend said the only way that a dream cannot be met is when I give up working towards it. Thank you! (you know who you are ^_^)

I shall start working towards it! Any good violin teacher to introduce?

For those who's interested:

Someone who teaches me to share

It's strange, that day I saw the old man who sleeps beside an escalator, I have a special concern for him. I don't know where that comes from and why not to the others who share the other corner of the escalator. Maybe is his face expression that attracts me.

I looked at my hand, just received a water bottle from the bus conductor. I was on my way to Singapore that night. Suddenly an urge surge through my heart, just before the bus pull away, I ran down and quickly charged towards the man and just before I reached his place, I slowed down and quietly walk near him and put down the water bottle beside him. I then quickly turned and ran back to the bus like I have someone chasing after me from behind! The conductor was kind enough to wait for me. He smiled at me and I returned the smile.

I return to my seat and sat down quietly. Some passenger from the bus greets me with weird look but I just concentrate on the old man. Not long after I embarked the bus, the old man turned his back and found the water bottle beside him. He took the bottle and go back to sleep. What's difference now is he hugged the bottle to sleep with a little smile on his face.

Seeing him smile, I have greater happiness in heart. Though I can't help much for his situation, I've learned to be able to make a difference just at that moment make life wonderful. From then on, I have decided that life is to share and forever, I will share mine.

Thank you, the One who teaches me the happiness of sharing.

one day...

Everything started with one day..

one day, I do not realized I need baby suckie to sleep
one day, I found myself graduated from kindergarden
one day, I found myself graduated from primary school
one day, I found myself graduated from secondary school
one day, I found myself at an graduation ceremony for my bachelor degree
one day, I found myself getting the first pay check in life!
one day, I realized my surrounding things can be interesting
one day, I found myself enjoy watching frog crossing the road
one day, I found myself enjoy eating ice-cream during raining days
one day, I found myself enjoy dancing in the rain
one day, I found myself enjoy looking at people's face expression
one day, I felt grown up when I received my house keys
one day, I felt like living in my own wonderland
one day, I realized people come and go in my life
one day, I realized I do hurt people that's close to me
one day, I realized they still loves me no matter what
one day, I found I was blessed everyday
every day, I thank you for being part of my life